Spring

Morning coffee looks like this these days I'm not complaining. 

Saying good bye to a friend.

This is a picture of my broken heart. It's my horse nestle you see standing in the field. What you can't really see is over to the right a little is the body of our 30+ year old, American quarter horse penny. She had been failing in health for sometime now. Not really ill just old. I begged her to live through the winter. I babied her. But in the end I called for the vet. It was time. It was a beautiful warm spring day. She had layed down in the barn the night before. I was sure I would find her there in the morning. But no sometime in the night she managed to walk to the back pasture and lay down in her favorite spot. I went to her. The night before I held her head in my lap in the barn. We had stuff to say to each other. I had to let her go. I called the vet, my daughter and our friend with the backhoe. The weather was calling for bad storms later that night. My daughter got here first. The vet followed her in the gate. We all walked to penny in the back pasture. We said goodbye and rubbed her neck as the vet quickly did his job. She was gone. It was ok. It was over on a warm spring day with the sun warm on her fur. Then we went back to the house. My daughter left. I waited for the backhoe and talked with nestle. This really was going to be the hardest part and I knew it. The evening came, and so did the very bad storms with hail. Nestle would not come to the barn. She stood in the rain and hail over penny's body. I cried. The backhoe couldn't get in till the next morning. We waited. He came and dug the hole. Nestle was right there. I thought if she was there she would not try to find penny. It was the saddest thing ever. After the burial nestle ran the fences calling for penny her long time friend. Her pasture mate. Here it is a week later. She is still calling for her. Not as much but still calling. It has been a grieving process for us all.

My daughter Kelsey in what could have been her last year in 4h I think 8 years ago.with penny. 

This past spring with her blanket still on. 

Just last year in the summer, she looked so good. Nestle is on the left in this photo. 

Doing what she did best giving littles their first ride on a horse. At farm camp here on the farm. And now for the funny parts there always are. Penny was a jumper from a nearby college when she came to us for a 4 h horse so many years ago. She had been poorly trained ( kneed in the side when putting on her cinch). I know this because every time I put a saddle on her she tried to bite me! I have always been gentle with all of my animals. And they know it. Because she never did actually bite me. When I was going through my divorce after 25 years... We rode at the park every Tuesday for a year. She was the best horse ever. Once I got the saddle on her. I loved those rides. Just she and I. We caught the first snowfall, watched the deer, spooked up wild turkey, listened to Cowboys on the trail who never knew we were there. Walked through woods , up and down steep hills, rivers and ravines. I gained so much confidence in myself. She was just a quarter horse. As a little girl growing up in a town, I wanted to grow up and live on a farm with horses.  I've had llamas, goats, chickens pigs , a calf, bunnies, doggies and cats. And penny was one of my dreams come true. All of our big animal friends are gone now except for nestle. I already miss penny so much. My daughter is grown now and I really should not get another horse. And make more work for myself. Let's face it livestalk = money and work. But the rewards ... The rewards are plentyful . Till we meet again old girl I will miss you.